Encroach

August 3, 2005

I am contaminated by whats been done to me.

August 4, 2005

If only I could peel away the putrid flesh engrossing my body; bleed out the poison. Beauty blossoms deep within only to be lost among fear. The walls have collapsed leaving the path destroyed.

August 5, 2005

Where does love go when it has gone? Perhaps it was never there. There is no way to go back now.

August 6, 2005

Pain always finds a way of seeping out. Maybe if people were asking I wouldn’t feel like sharing the secret so badly. I would say “don’t you feel bad now for not noticing?”

August 7, 2005

If only I could collapse inside myself.

Doubt

It swarms around my head searching for a way inside. I wish I could bolt the doors and windows and scream out, but instead I invite it in for tea. I get few words in, too busy cooking and feeding. I welcome the insults, which sound satisfyingly more painful in my own voice. “You’re going to drive yourself crazy” others say, they don’t understand.

 

Regret

So hard to break beneath the waves that crash and swirl around me. The salty taste fills my mouth and nose and burns inside my chest. If only I could swim back to shore, where the water was beautiful.